who is an artist?

art i saw last month.

can i be creative? typically.
can i be artistic? not really.
can i be crafty? always.
can i be imaginative? sometimes.

i live in what most people define as an "artsy neighborhood." i've also met a number people in the last two months who are artists by profession or want to be. my question for the people in my neighborhood, the people i have met, and anyone else, is this- what makes someone an artist? is it your skill, how much time you spend doing art, or something else?

some people think that everyone is an artist, while others disagree.

last weekend, my friends and i went to a senior art show at the u of m. there were a few pieces i would have bought right there, if they were for sale and i had the money to afford them. some pieces i had questions about and wanted to know what inspired the artists to create them. there was also artwork there that i did not like or understand. i then went to a concert that night and would definitely describe the band as artistic.

does this mean it is the viewer (or audience) who decides what is art or is it the person who created it who decides?

when i think about myself being an artist, i do not typically believe i am (especially as the amount of high-quality art i am exposed to increases).

creative and crafty are words i would associate more with myself. i like to repurpose things. some can be more elaborate than others. a granola bar box now has a cs lewis quote painted on it and is hanging in my room. a beehive box i found in the woods is now a picture frame. dozens of coffee sleeves were glued onto cardboard which is hanging in my kitchen. these items seem like crafts more than art, especially compared to a lot of the artwork that has been created over the last few centuries.

maybe one day i will view myself as artistic, but i might need to take a few classes from my artsy neighbors first.

do you see yourself as an artist? what is the difference being crafty and artistic for you?

a reason for moving.

have you ever started a paper, journal entry, blog, or even email and then cannot finish it? i have started 5 blog posts over the last 2 months and have not been able to finish any of them. i became too busy, indecisive of what to say, or fearful of peoples' opinions to finish the entries.

i also was becoming overwhelmed with all the articles, blogs, tweets, and posts that can be read online that i didn't want to contribute to it all for awhile with my blog. though, here i am. back in the "blog world." giving my opinion. sharing my story. opening up my thoughts and emotions to people i know and others i will never meet.

my life has changed quite a bit from 2 months ago. i moved to south minneapolis.

after about a month of living here, God told me one reason He wanted me in minneapolis- there are some people who move to places where nature surrounds them. trees, mountains, lakes, oceans, or whatever it that allows them to be in God's beautiful creation and sense His presence.

God told me that like people who move to colorado or the country to be surrounded by beauty, i am supposed to be in minneapolis. He wants me to see the beauty in people. not only see their outward appearances (though tattoos, dreads and beards are a glorious sight to some), but see the souls of people.

each person i meet has a beautiful story and is uniquely crafted to fit in this world.

i came to this city to learn about people and not just by people watching, which is something i do enjoy. learning about people means starting conversations with them, asking questions, and spending time with them. it also means being hospitable, not always worrying about a schedule, listening well, and being honest about who i am.

seeing the beauty in a person means understanding who they were created by and how in need they are of knowing their Creator.

minneapolis residents and visitors, you are beautiful because God created you. i cannot wait to meet more of you.

women hold up half the sky.

after graduation last may, i had to stop reading books. my brain was tired and i needed to focus on something other than black words in times new roman. i picked up a few books in july, but i didn't get very far.

in november, i was given a book by one of my coworkers. it is called Half the Sky. it is a collection of stories about women around the world who are marginalized, abused, trafficked and treated without respect.

my plan has been since i started to FINISH this book, even though i am barely half-way through it and it's almost march already. i think it is taking me so long because the stories are about real women. knowing about the trauma, pain, and tragic situations they go through is hard to grasp. though, it also is empowering to read because of the victories these women experience while being oppressed. not all of the women are triumphant or even live, but their stories will live on. their stories are haunting and inspiring.

the book reminds me that we each have a story. none of these women are celebrities or famous, but they are each a woman created by the Creator of this universe. they were given life, whether they believe it or not, from God to live.

i wanted to share one story in the book about a woman from Afghanistan. her name is Zoya and she was 21 while this story was written. Zoya was married at the age of 12, which is when the beatings began. not only did her husband beat her, but his entire family did as well. there was not a reason behind the corporal punishment, they made up illegitimate ones to do it.

one day, Zoya resisted the beatings by her mother-in-law which, "is an outrageous sin."

"the next day, her father-in-law strapped Zoya's feet together, tied her down, and gave a stick to the mother-in-law, who whipped the soles of Zoya's feet."

Zoya knew she did not deserve that kind of beating where her feet felt like yogurt after, but she also believed that at times it was okay for wives to get beaten. Zoya said, "but if the wife is truly disobedient, then of course her husband has to be beat her."

the authors, Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn followed that statement with, "women themselves absorb and transmit misogynistic values, just as men do. this is not a tidy world of tyrannical men and victimized women, but a messier realm of oppressive social customs adhered to by men and women a like. as we said, laws can help, but the greatest challenge is to change these ways of thinking." 

misogynistic means having or showing a hatred and distrust of women. i had never heard this word until reading the book and i had to look up the definition. this story and other ones in the book show that women around the world believe that it is okay to be hated. their traditions, culture, family, and husbands are telling them that women are to be hated at times.

i can partially understand that some women (and men) have this belief because of the culture they live in, but i do not agree with it at all. additionally, i do not understand how the mother-in-laws are okay with participating in the beatings? did they never get beaten? woman and men were created to be equal. women deserve just as much as men. and according to a chinese proverb and the title of the book, "women hold up half the sky."

whether you are a male or female, i want you all to think of a woman in your life who has made a difference. think of someone who is gentle and strong, honest, compassionate, hardworking, or full of joy. maybe it is your grandmother or a professor or a friend. i am asking that you tell them this week why you appreciate them. maybe it is through a note, a phone call, or better yet in person.

also, please pray RIGHT NOW for the women like Zoya who are being beaten because of their gender and social circumstances. pray against the misogynistic behaviors and beliefs. pray that opportunities would continue to be given to women in oppression. pray that the testimonies of women around the world and in your community would be shared.

i can be stubborn.

i went to a gathering of young adults a few weeks ago at a church in the suburbs. a friend invited me and i'll admit i was reluctant to go at first. i was tired and do not attend the church so i figured i wouldn't know anyone. a conversation with the Lord started of whether i should go or not. these conversations have happened before. it typically starts with me giving all my excuses of why i shouldn't/can't do something. yes, i do get sassy with the Lord sometimes. then He reminds me that His plans and ways are better than mine. He then patiently waits till i say yes. that night, the dialogue lasted for at least 30 minutes, but i "caved in" and decided to go. plus, the extrovert in me typically wins when it comes to making decisions about what to do with my time.

a group of us bundled up, got in two cars and drove to the church. none of us knew what to expect.

the gal in my car and i followed some random people inside. the room was dimly lit and it seemed like we were at a party. music was being played loudly and people were everywhere. at that point, i was ready to turn around and head out the door. really Lord, this is why i am here. to go to a party? i am tired. i stayed.

my group of friends and i had no idea what was going on. naturally, we huddled up in a circle amidst the larger group. we started dancing, chatting, and making the best our time together! we then heard that the program was about to begin. 

after a few worship songs, the speaker started talking. i then realized why i was there. he talked about parts of Scripture like i had never heard before. he gave me an entire new outlook on Genesis 29, the story of Rachel and Leah. then he started talking about Romans and other Scripture related to be known by God and forgiven at the same time.

Psalm 103:1-12 was then read.

i felt like i was being hit by a pound a bricks or tackled in the snow to get me to really pay attention. this was it, why i needed to be at this event. God used a gathering of people my age to have me see what these 12 verses say. He did create me, so i guess He does know how to get my attention.

Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name. Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your disease, who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy, who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed. He made known his ways to Moses, his acts to the people of Israel. The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.
-Psalm 103:1-12

there are three reason this Scripture stood out to me. over the last few months i've been learning about being healed from brokenness and overcoming sin. these verses all about that. God knows what i have and will do, yet He is still merciful and gracious to me. He sent His Son to take the payment for our sins. the second reason, i am soon moving to Minneapolis to live in a community home. i will be living amongst and become neighbors with people who are also broken. i will have conversations with people who need to know God, how He is slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. lastly, one particular verse seemed to be bolded with lights flashing around it. The Lord works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed. this means that any person who is oppressed will at some point be given justice. the nonprofit i am going to be working at focuses on helping people who are oppressed. knowing that God will work out justice for them gives me such great hope. 

i can be stubborn, but somehow God finds a way to still graciously teach me in my stubbornness. i am thankful for a Heavenly Father who does not give up on me. He continues to love me and show me His ways.

what i learned yesterday

1. i need to get myself a Minneapolis library card when I move. i forgot how much i enjoy going to public libraries for many reasons: you can rent movies for 7 days for free, they have more books that i'll ever be able to read, and the library is a place to go for free when i need to get out of the house.

2. i am much more of a morning person than i thought (especially when the morning involves a beautiful brisk walk, cup of coffee, yummy breakfast, and lovely conversation with a friend).

3. confidence is not my middle name.

4. sin has power, but not authority.

5. new music helps me be more productive.

6. i am going to need an army of prayer warriors behind me in this next journey i am embarking on.

7. sledding is so exhilarating and i plan to keep going even as i become older. (yes, i will be that random adult who goes sledding with her friends at the age of 40 even if there are no children with us....adults should be able to have just as much fun as kids).

wanting, yet having sisters.

friendships have been on my mind a lot lately. this is probably because mine have been changing over the last few months. i ended a major season in my life this past spring and with that comes the end of seeing many of the people i ate with at lunch, sat next to in class or hung out with at dorm events. it amazes me how one year i can spend hours and hours with someone and then the next year i never see them again. God continues to bring or keep the exact people i need for each day of my life.

tonight, however, i wanted to hit pause. two of the gals that know me the best and who i consider my sisters came over to make indian food and then we went to listen to some live music. i am so grateful for these ladies and i wish we could spend every Friday night together. i also wish we could actually do what we talked about years ago which is have houses next to each other in colorado. but we can't spend every friday night together and we will most likely not all live in the same neighborhood in colorado. i needed to write about this night to remind myself that things will not always be the same (which is a good thing, otherwise life would be boring) and i can embrace every moment i spend with these women. 

friendships will change because that is the way life happens, but when i have a moment with my best friends, i don't always want it to end. i hope that is not too selfish of me to say. thank you God for giving me these sisters and all of the women in my life. i have always wanted a sister (because most of the dinner conversations at my house are about sports), yet i need to remember that i have many women in my life that i can call my sisters. this is definitely a blessing in disguise. they are the sisters i have always wanted, yet always had.

an unexpected lesson about Mary.

the night before Christmas was a difficult one for me. my stomach was in extreme pain, i had the chills and i could not fall asleep. as i was lying in bed, one of the first things that came to my mind was Mary. she was the girl who gave birth to Jesus in a cave.

i heard a sermon about the birth of Jesus a few days before and one thought that stuck out to me was that Mary was all alone when she was giving birth. she did not have doctors, a nurse or probably even Joseph to help her during the actual birth. i was stunned when i heard this because that seems impossible to me from what i have heard about giving birth from all the mothers i know.

on Christmas Eve i thought about what Mary was called to do. she had such confidence in the Lord to give birth to her soon-to-be son. she must of had such strength and faithfulness to do what the Lord was telling her she would do. i cannot imagine the pain she went through to give birth all by herself, in a cold cave and with no medicine. i have many questions i would love to ask Mary about what went through her head the day the angel told her she was going to give birth to the Messiah (Luke 1:31) or the moment she realized she was going to have a baby without having sex or how she got through the pregnancy all alone. for now, i will just marvel at how God decided to bring His Son into this world to become human.

He picked a way that was not fancy- a lowly manger. He picked a way that no other person has entered the world through- a virgin birth. He picked a way that is a glory that only He can have.

God set it up so from the beginning Jesus would be extraordinary and more than just a human. Jesus is fully God and fully man. He came down to earth to save humans from their sins. humans had (and still have) no way of creating a Savior for ourselves. God had to send His Son to be our Savior and He picked a way that glorified Himself, but yet it was such a humble way.

when i was feeling sick and wanting to fall asleep the night before celebrating Jesus' birthday, God wanted to remind me of who my Savior is and how He used a faithful young girl to birth Jesus into this world. He has and will continue to use the unexpected people who have faith in Him.


*** read here if you want to know more about the virgin birth or Mary